On Hold

I've been writing about how we'll likely move sometime in the near future for a little while now. Well, we're putting that plan on hold for the time being.

The first house that is in the same town as we currently reside doesn't look promising any more. The guy was supposed to close on his new house this month, move out next month, and we'd be able to move in in March - it was a done deal. Or, at least that's what he told me when he told me about it last year. We've tried to set up appointments to see it in person (we've seen the outside and he's described the inside. He's the same guy who renovated our house for us, so I never worried that it would be horrible on the inside), but every time it comes time to do it, it gets postponed. Now he's saying that he's waiting on a large sum of money to come through before he can close on the other house and it may not even be to until this summer. It just keeps getting more and more fishy. He also wouldn't price match what the other house was listed at.

The second house that my friend told me about doesn't seem to likely work either. We've tried contacting the owners and they've just never gotten back to us. Plus we drove by there to find that it's within spittin' distance of a bar. I asked my friend about it and she said it wasn't a rowdy college student party bar, but a quiet place to stop by after work. It still made us feel uncomfortable though, so I think we're throwing it out.

We can stay here easily for the next twoish years, until we have another child after Tony. We're planning on having our kids about two years apart, so we have two years to really embrace our home and see where we are then. By staying where we are (it has a lower monthly payment than either of the two defunct house possibilities) we'll be able to set aside a lot of money to pay off debt and save up for when we will move. I'm all about saving. Then, we may not have to compromise and really get what we want instead of getting out of where we are.

I really don't want to rush into getting a house now just to have one in time for the summer for Audrey to play outside. Especially considering I have business to wrap up and a baby to prepare for. I need to focus on my family rather than finding a new home and settling for something that isn't what we'd want. We still have the same issues (crazy animals outside, drafty, no storage, no fenced in yard), but have decided to focus on how blessed we are and how much we really do love our house and make the best of it. There are so many homeless people out there right now who would keel over to have this house. We really are blessed.

We're going to dig through everything and donate a lot of stuff (I dropped off three huge bags of items at the Goodwill this morning) and organize everything we want to keep. Rearranging the house last night actually made a huge improvement. I can't believe that such simple actions can really make a difference, but it's crazy. I really wish I had done it sooner. I'll take pictures later when Audrey gets up from her nap. We also plan on saving up to buy a kitchen island from a local craftsman to help with the insane lack of storage and counter space in our kitchen. We've decided that we won't buy anything new from big box stores and try to buy used as much as we can. But kitchen islands are hard to come by and there are a lot of fantastic carpenters out here that we wouldn't mind supporting.

As far as the crazy animals, I'm hesitant to call animal control because if the lady sees them at my house going under it looking for animals, she'll know I'm the one who called the shelter on her "precious babies." But I'm inching closer and closer to doing it with every sleep deprived night. I'll just have to get off my behind and take the kids to the park to play outside. And, of course, Audrey's grandmothers want to give money to buy her a play house for her birthday next month. We're just going to put it in her account and get her one later.

We have our space heater and will just bundle up extra in the winters to combat all the drafts. Having all of us sleeping in one room while closing the doors and running the little heater has been wonderful. We stay warm, heat isn't too wasted, and the bill stays low. It's been a very cold winter and we haven't had any issues so far, so I think we'll survive.

So, long story short, unless God opens up a crazy door and makes it evident that we are to move, we are embracing this house. We had been hesitant for preparing for Tony because we were sure a move was imminent for the past few months. Well, now we can really embrace turning this into a home for a family of four. Both my husband and I have peace about it. Especially when we think of how much we could save for when the time comes to actually get a new house.

There we are. If God sent us an angel and provided a Gideon moment, I'd consider moving. But, unless that happens, we're staying put and just praising Him for His provision. He hasn't forsaken us yet, and I doubt he'll start now. It'll all be okay.

I'm Nesting!

Finally! I was beginning to think something is wrong with me! Granted, I've been working on editing family shoots from the end of last year, setting up family shoots for the summer, editing the remaining weddings from last year and getting paperwork and orders done. I haven't been slacking... just not behaving like a normal pregnant woman.



But I got the nesting bug tonight - at 10pm. I probably should have taken before pictures to compare the afters to, but I was so concentrated on doing it that I didn't think of it until after the fact.



Here's what I've accomplished tonight:



Scrubbed the mess out of one of the tubs. We're in the country so our water leaves horrible stains everywhere. It's not a task I could do by myself with Audrey around, and I kept asking my husband to do it. My requests fell on deaf ears. So, I went in there tonight right before bath time and used an entire Mr. Clean Magic Eraser. I'm going to pick up more tomorrow to finish the job. :) It still isn't done, but it's a marked improvement. It's not like the tub was filthy as in moldy... just stained from the water. We're not THAT bad.



Moved the baker's rack with the diapers and blankets from the play room into the living room.



Moved the changing station (a pack and play that has never been used for it's intended purpose but serves as the perfect place to change pants) from the play room into the living room. It's not gorgeous, but it's practical.



Moved the dressers for both Tony and Audrey from the spare/storage room into the play room. They are now caddy corner on either ends of the same wall and look pretty good in there. Tomorrow we're going to secure them to the wall and put in drawer locks. I also put stuff on top of the dressers... pictures (well, picture frames for Tony), piggy banks, etc. Tomorrow I'm also going to go get letters to spell out Tony's name and put them over his dresser. It's beginning to look more like a room for two kids to play in instead of just Audrey's room.



Moved the big glider from the corner of the play room to between the two dressers.



Moved the big plastic bins from the bedroom and office into the spare room where the dressers used to be. This made me so happy to do. Granted, I now have an entire wall that is lined with big bins, but it works. They're centrally located and not all over the house. Next weekend we're going to go through the bins and organize and label them.



Moved all of my photography props that were in the spare room into my office, thus consolidating all of my work stuff.



Went through the final miscellaneous items from Tony's shower (took rattles out of packaging, organized first aid stuff, etc.) and put them away.



Used the bag that was holding all of Tony's miscellaneous items to bag up Audrey's boyfriend's birthday present.



Went through clothes that Audrey doesn't fit into any more and folded and organized them.



Put away the luggage that had been siting out since our Christmas trip to New England.

Reorganized books and magazines in the spare room.

Took out Audrey's new toothbrush holder. I was saving that until we moved and had an actual counter instead of a pedestal sink, but I figured what the hey.

I hope I can keep this up! I keep seeing or thinking of things to do, but just never got around to it. Now I feel like I'm being productive and preparing for Tony to come.

I still need to wash the cloth diapers and wipes, get my husband to wash the ceiling fans (we have 11+ish foot ceilings, to there's no way I can reach even with a step stool), finish scrubbing the tubs, reorganize the bathrooms, wash my mama cloth (and possibly get some more). And accomplish all that was on my initial list. I'm getting there.

Birth Plan

I have finally drawn up my birth plan for Tony. I've told my doctor already that I want a natural birth, but was unable to do so last time due to pre-e, GD, blood issues and pretty much anything else out there. I've told her that it's really important to me, and she's completely fine with it. And she's even recommended by the state natural birth group. I don't think she'll see anything wrong with this, at least I hope not. I also hope I'm not forgetting anything...

During my labor and delivery experience I would like to have:

*Only my husband present.

*No healthcare students or resident physicians as observers.

LABOR PLAN

*I would like to avoid an enema.

*I would like to walk around and change position whenever I feel I need to during labor.

*I would like to utilize the birthing ball.

*I would like to be offered the option of laboring in the shower, utilizing the shower massage.

*I would like to wear my own clothes during labor.

*I would like to have clear liquids by mouth throughout the first stage of labor.

*I would like the lights to be low and the room to be as quiet as possible during my labor.

* I would really prefer no saline lock regardless of the hospital’s policy.

*I would prefer to keep the vaginal exams to a minimum—I will request them when I am ready to know the status of dilation.

*I do not wish to have continuous fetal monitoring unless it is required by the baby's condition.

*I do not want an internal fetal monitor unless the baby has shown signs of distress.

*I do not wish to have the amniotic membrane ruptured artificially.

*I do not wish to have my labor augmented by pitocin. ** This is VERY important to me. I don’t even want to see pitocin or hear the word. I’m prepared to deal with a long labor if it happens.

ANESTHESIA PLAN

*NONE! :)

DELIVERY PLAN

*Unless absolutely necessary, I would like to avoid a cesarean delivery. I believe that my plans for a birth free of a “cascade of interventions” will allow for the slimmest of chances that a c-section will be required. If for some reason it is truly required, I trust Dr. T to communicate that to me.

*I would like my birth partner present at all times if I require a cesarean delivery.

*I would like to hold the baby immediately after birth unless it is contraindicated by the baby's condition. (Please place him on my chest immediately.)

*I would like to be allowed to choose the position in which I give birth, which may include squatting.

*Even if I am fully dilated, and assuming the baby is in no distress, I would like to try to wait until I feel the urge to push before beginning the pushing phase.

*I would prefer not to have an episiotomy.

*Perineal massage is fine as long as it is gentle.

*I would appreciate guidance on when to push and when to stop pushing so the perineum can stretch.

*I would like a local anesthetic to repair a tear.

PLAN FOR IMMEDIATELY AFTER BIRTH

*I would like to have the baby placed skin-to-skin on my chest immediately after delivery. **This is VERY important to me. I do know that the BEST place to regulate temperature is on a mother’s chest, not in a warmer.

*I would like to wait until the umbilical cord stops pulsing before having my husband cut it.

*I would appreciate the opportunity to breastfeed as soon as possible after birth. ** This is VERY important to me.

*I would like to hold the baby while the placenta is delivered and while any tissue repairs are made.

*I would prefer to keep the baby skin-to-skin on my chest rather than under a baby warmer and would like for all baby assessments and treatments to be done while I am holding the baby.

*If I am unable to hold the baby immediately after delivery, I would like for my birth partner to be offered the opportunity to hold the baby skin-to-skin as long as the baby's condition is not compromised.

*I would like the baby's eye treatment to be delayed for the first several hours after birth so that we might be able to see each other clearly and have the opportunity to bond. ** This is VERY important to me.

*I will determine whether or not I would like the baby to be given Vitamin K at all—provided the cord is allowed to stop pulsing before it is cut, he should be able to get all the Vitamin K he needs between that and immediate breastfeeding, since colostrum is rich in Vitamin K. If my labor is prolonged, I will make the decision to go ahead with the shot.

*I would prefer that the baby not be bathed, only cleaned up of any “blood and guts.” Please do not remove the vernix from his skin, because I practice the “breast crawl” technique to initiate breastfeeding.

*We are a cloth-diapering family. :) My husband and I are happy to do all diaper changes—no nurses will be asked to learn how to use our diapers. We understand that you are busy! We do ask that no disposable diapers be used on our baby at all.

POSTPARTUM PLAN

*Please no Hep B vaccine.

*I do not wish to be separated from my baby for any reason.

*I would like the baby to stay with me during the day and night, and for baby care to be done in the room whenever possible.

*I am planning to breastfeed and would like to do so on-demand. I do not want a nurse telling me to feed on a schedule or forcefully suggest that I bottle feed. **This is VERY important to me, and I know it can be done successfully without artificial milk.

*I do not want the baby to be given a pacifier. ** This is VERY important to me.

*I do not want the baby to be given any bottles, including glucose water or plain water. ** IF it is medically necessary for the baby to be given supplementary nutrition, I would like for it to be administered via SNS tube attached to my breast.

*I would like to meet with a Lactation Consultant. I breastfed my first for 19 months, but it’s been a while since I’ve nursed a newborn.

*I plan on my support person staying overnight with me in the hospital.

*I would like to have my family and friends visit me at their convenience during visiting hours.

*I do not wish for my baby to be circumcised. ** This is VERY important to me.

I understand that my plan will be followed unless my situation becomes medically unsafe.

Bad Day

How do you deal with bad days? Just keep on keepin' on, or mope like Oscar the Grouch?

Today was a bad day for me. Granted, not bad in the grand scheme of things, but still not ideal.

I'll break my day down into the big issues, so that I can fully whine about my problems in a really non-productive manner.

Issue #1: No sleep. I know, I know, it's to be expected. It'll get worse when Tony comes. And I realize that. But what contributes to it isn't the general end-of-the-pregnancy uncomfortableness (although that is no fun). No, what causes it is this: we're out in the country and there are no fences in any one's yards, right? We're also in the South so our houses are built above ground to let air circulate under to keep it cool in the summer. Well, a lady down the road from us "rescues" animals. I.e. she feeds them, but doesn't take them in, find them homes, bring them to the shelter, gets them their shots, takes them to the vet, etc. So when it's near freezing, guess who's house they decide to camp out under? That's right. There are a bunch of cats and dogs under my house making horrible noise (crying, meowing, barking, fighting, one sounds like it's in heat) all night long. But I'm in a hard place, because this neighbor mowed our yard for us when I was very sick in early pregnancy, so I don't want to be mean. And I love animals, but I can't take care of every stray animal in the area that this woman decides to "adopt." So the barnyard under my house keeps me up all.stinking.night.long. Audrey and my husband, however, sleep right through it.

Issue#2: The noises cause me to have crazy dreams - when I can sleep. Like last night, I had a dream that my husband heard someone break into our house. We looked around, but didn't see anyone so assumed all was okay. I had my husband sit on the couch and I brought him a cup of water. I went to the bathroom to find the shower curtain disheveled. When I went to put it in, someone grabbed my hands and pushed back at me making this awful sound - which I'm pretty sure was one of those darn cats. Scared the mess out of me and I didn't sleep for the rest of the night.

Issue #3: My OB's office is incompetent. Not my OB. I love her. She's actually very supportive of natural birth, no interventions, and even my decision to home school Audrey. Well, today as I'm leaving, I had to deal with one of the ladies in her office. I do not like this lady at all. She is not good with people. She refuses to give me morning appointments, causing me to go in with a very hungry and tired Audrey at lunch/nap time and getting frustrated when my kid gets up set. Well, no duh, woman. You won't give me an appointment when it's not nap time. I never have this issue with anyone else there. Sometimes she'll schedule my appointment without asking me, hand me my reminder card, and walk away so I can't complain or ask for another time. Well, today she took the top of the cake. She informed me that instead of waiting until after the birth, adding up all of the costs and making a payment plan for the cost that I had to pay $3500 within three weeks! And that I was actually supposed to have paid this BEFORE I was 28 weeks. I'm 34 weeks and JUST found this out. I have to pay for the doctor's delivery costs, whether or not she's the one there to deliver, BEFORE I even step foot into the hospital, BEFORE the hospital even gets paid, and it may not even apply to my deductible. I am furious. And, of course, I was there at lunch time with a squirmy toddler climbing on a huge belly and she sprung this on me... and handed me paper work dated LAST YEAR when she was actually supposed to tell me about it and asked me to pay it TODAY. I'm sorry, you screw up and want me to just give you $3500 RIGHT NOW? Are you nuts, woman? Good thing my husband is a lawyer. They closed right after I left, so he's going to call Monday and give them a good talking to. According to their "contract" that I was forced to sign today, I was supposed to be given this information months ago, and the paper work is dated months ago. So they breached their own contract there and it's borderline fraud with the post dating. For them to demand the payment on such a short notice without any mention beforehand is not in agreement with what they have stated, so they've breached it themselves and they have to give us the extra time to make the payments.

Issue #4: My daughter WILL NOT NAP today. Ugh. I'm exhausted, mad, frustrated, and she won't nap. Typically, I'm very even tempered and calm and if she won't nap, I just let her calmly play to have some down time. But I could have REALLY used a nap today. Oh well.

Issue #5: A client of my husband's is asking him for money. He's doing a pro bono case for a woman who needed help because she felt she had been wrongly fired. Well, now she's having issues with her landlord and wants him to do this case as well - again for no money. He specializes in maritime and insurance, so this is way out of his field of specialty. He politely told her he could not take the case (especially since he wouldn't get paid at all for any of the work) and referred her to other attorneys in the area. Well, one attorney will take her case, but requires a retainer. She's now wanting my husband to give her $2000 for the retainer and to pay any other attorney's fees as a result because she can't pay. Of course he told her no, and it's not something that is typically done. But it's still frustrating that she keeps pestering and asking.

Oh well. In good news, I'm very blessed. I have a wonderful husband, a beautiful daughter (who is wearing her cranky pants today), and a healthy son. And I plan on making apple pie floats by the truck load and drinking them all night long - once my husband comes home so I can hide in my office and not have to share.

Apple Pie Floats:

Vanilla ice cream (or the non-dairy equivalent)
Apple cider (not apple juice)
Ginger Ale (organic or not, your choice)

I prefer a 60/40 cider to ale ratio, my husband likes 50/50. Oh yeah, I'm the kind of person who plans on moping about my bad day.

Chipping Away

I've been slowly chipping away at my to-do list for before Tony comes. At this point, it looks like the move might get pushed back a few months (those things always happen), so I haven't been in a panic to get things done. My nesting has been non-existent.

But... I have done some things.

We bought and froze a bunch of meat for easy crock pot meals after he's born. We've started a list of what's in the chest freezer and the fridge freezer so we can keep track of everything as well.

I've washed all of Tony's clothes that he received at the shower, and returned the diapers and wipes. Well, with the exception of one pack of each. Last Sunday a family visited our church and I found out later that they are homeless. They have a preschooler, a toddler, and a newborn. It broke my heart. So I plan on giving them the biggest containers that I received of diapers and wipes if they come back again this Sunday. I pray that they do.

Anyway, in preparing for Tony's birth I realized that we have NO storage in our house. This is something I realized a while back. We have a teeny tiny little closet - for the whole house. It can hold Audrey's and my clothes. Beau's hang in the laundry room. Belongings that don't need to be out are hidden behind doors in big plastic bins. That's another reason we're moving. It's not an over clutter of junk either. It's holiday decorations and seasonal clothes, picture albums, books, craft items. Stuff that we use frequently, just with no other place to put them. But it hit me all over again.

And Beau and I had been using the same dressers we had since we were kids. It was easy when we were newlyweds, he had his dresser, I had mine. When Audrey came we hung her dresses up and split the rest of her stuff between our dressers. Then when we started getting stuff for Tony, we couldn't fit everything for four people into the dressers, which made me feel like a horrible housekeeper because we were living out of baskets.

In comes Craigslist... my husband and I bought our first dresser! It's ugly as all get out, and we're in the process of revamping it. But, it was $50, and by the time we're finished redoing it, it'll still end up costing us $100 cheaper than the cheapest dresser at Wal Mart. It has potential.

This is what it looked like when my husband first brought it in - don't worry, it has the other drawers. This made me realize how small our master room is. It was fine without a dresser. It would also be fine if we didn't believe in co-sleeping.

Yes, we're *those* people. Audrey slept with us until she was one and moved to her big girl bed. She's on the other side of the room from us in her own space so no one is bothering each other. Before that, she was in the crib which was side-carred to our bed. Think a giant bassinet on that one. Tony will be in the side-carred crib now. And don't think we don't have a personal life, we're expecting another kid, so obviously it's all good in the hood.

And, yes, I realize that our bed spread and our bed skirt don't match. Last year I fell in LOVE with this gorgeous orange bed spread and bought it. Well, it turns out that it's too big for our washing machine to handle and has to be dry cleaned. At $30 bucks a pop, I just wash our current one more frequently. We have the bed skirt to match this bed spread, but my husband put it away while trying to be helpful and doing laundry one day. It hasn't been seen since.

Now, when we move, we will be keeping Tony with us (I'm big on co-sleeping for the first year) and Audrey will be getting her own room.

My assistant showing off her new amber anklet to help with the teething pain.

Here it is with the drawers in. It needs A LOT of work. We bought new hardware for it and when we have a chance we're going to paint it black to match our headboard and night stand. Don't worry, I thoroughly cleaned everything with Basic H the moment it came in the house.

My husband replacing the hardware. I know it may seem silly to do that before painting it. But we wanted to make sure that the stuff we chose would fit so we could return it if necessary. And, with our 90%+ humidity winters, realistically it'll be a while before we can get outside to paint it.

The new knobs for the first drawer. I think they'll look good with the black. What do you think?

Here you can see the drawer pulls I chose for the bottom two drawers.

And compared to the old funky one(s). I think it's an improvement already.

And here's my husband putting them in on the other side.

So now we have our very own dresser for the first time since being married, Tony has his daddy's dresser and Audrey has my dresser. I even reorganized all of their clothes so that each drawer is for a specific set of items and my husband has less of an excuse to get them all messed up. I better not find a onesie in with the sleepers or a cardigan in with the tights, is all I'm saying.

I even bought a bunch of storage bins that were on sale coz they're Christmas colors (like it affects the way they work) to pack away unneeded items. Here's little miss modeling one of the bins yesterday.

One obstacle partly done, 1000000 more to do.

Sensory Bins

Finally, right?!

Right now we have three bins made with two in rotation. The first one is a Christmas one, and since Christmas is over, it's been put away until next year.

Here's a picture of the Christmas bin:

I got all of the items from Hobby Lobby when they had their Christmas sale at 90% off. It has:

mini pine cones

blue fuzzy pom poms

white fuzzy pom poms

red fuzzy pom poms

a clear bead tree garland

mini presents

snowmen

felt Christmas trees

white sparkly snow flakes

silver sparkly snow flakes

glittery candy canes

I plan on adding to it later on as well. At her age she gets to notice the different shapes, sizes, patterns, colors and textures while she's playing. She can sort the items and as she gets bigger we'll work on sorting into different categories with specific instructions, writing the letter the item begins with, writing what the item is, writing a story about the item, etc. It's something that can really grow with her over the years.

This is the Mardi Gras bin, which is one of the bins that is in rotation right now:

Here's Audrey a while back when I first wrote about the sensory bins and tried to take pictures of them. She sat in it in protest because she wanted her stuff. How dare Mommy try to blog!

I got all of the items from Hobby Lobby and plan on adding to it when stuff goes on sale in March.

It has:

purple feathers

green feathers

yellow feathers

purple felt squares

green felt squares

yellow felt squares

fleur de lis stickers

"Mardi Gras" stickers

Mardi Gras beads

a clear bead garland

purple bells

green bells

yellow bells

And here is our other bin we have out right now, for Valentine's Day:

I got everything from the Dollar Spot in Target (love that section)

It has:

purple plastic hearts

pink plastic hearts

small heart containers

medium heart containers

one large heart container

one heart tin pail

one red tin pail

heart shaped cookie cutters

"X" shaped cookie cutter

"O" shaped cookie cutter

red foam hearts

pink foam hearts

white foam hearts

red paper heart doilies

heart shaped ice cube trays

heart shaped measuring cups

heart shaped erasers

mouth shaped erasers

"I *heart* U" erasers

Audrey is loving using the measuring cups and pails to sort the pink and purple plastic hearts and transferring them from one container to another. She's working on colors, motor skills, sorting and organizing and having fun - you can't beat that.

This is how they end up a lot of the times - stuff strewn about everywhere. But, after the initial trying to sneak away like she didn't do it, she plays with everything and helps clean up her mess. It's good times.

I plan on doing more for each of the seasons and holidays - Spring, Easter, Summer, 4th of July, Fall, Thanksgiving (we don't really do Halloween here), etc.

I love that it's something that can engage all of her senses from this age until she's much older and that Tony and future kids will be able to use and enjoy as well.

And I'll write more later as we do more. I figure we'll move into an Easter one after March 8th (Mardi Gras day/beginning of lent) and then a Spring one after that.

I Have Found the Drawback

I mentioned earlier that we decided to get an audio Bible and have it playing in our house 24/7. We've done it with the exception of when we were on vacation. Everything was unplugged for safety and I figured the guy we had checking on our house would have freaked out if he heard talking.

We love it. It plays in my back office because our ancient CD player in the living room doesn't work. I get to hear it when I come to the back of the house to do laundry, trash or work in my office. I definitely think it has helped to keep me calm during the day. There's just something about the power of the Word.

But, I have found the drawback... because we got the theatrical version (which is so nifty) it absolutely scared the mess out of me when a possessed man spoke. The voice was a composition of a bunch of different ones all distorted to emphasize the freaky aspect.

Other than that, it was a great decision and I plan on having it play in the house all the time from here on out. Just don't be scared if you get the theatrical version and hear a demon... there's no real demons in your house. Well, at least I hope not!